How to have a feminist Valentine’s Day

Valentine's Day

Valentine’s Day is a tricky holiday. It apparently just used to be a day to eat to celebrate Saint Valentine of Rome. Today though, the words ‘highly commercial’ spring to mind.

Thanks to Disney films or any romance movies really, us women have grown up with a pretty standard idea of femininity. Surprise surprise, Valentine’s Day has been another culprit, a day of grand gestures and cheesy gifts that have validated this behaviour. However, as misguided as this dynamic is, it is still a highly profitable one. Last year alone, the British spent £1.5 billion on Valentine’s Day.

Given the current social and political landscape, thanks to movements such as #Metoo and the Women’s March, more of us have started to see the holiday as an outdated, capitalist and superficial day. Not that I’m dramatic or anything. Here you are sisters, an array of different ways you can have a feminist Valentine’s Day, without sacrificing the roses of course.


Valentine’s Day is a day to celebrate love. Use it to show up for a revolutionary cause you are passionate about. A charity or non-profit could massively benefit and it’s an exceptional way to show your love for multiple individuals. Shop at small women-led businesses as well, our favourites include: nuddy, My Stackers or even our Smart Girl Tribe shop.

Get sexy

Can I just take a moment to remind you how sexy you are? You really are, I love your hair, eyes and legs. Now, I want you to celebrate your own sexiness, you don’t need someone else to remind you. Head down to Victoria Secret or Boux and purchase some sexy underwear. Don’t only go into these stores when you think someone special might be seeing them. Get a sexy something for yourself, because you deserve it.

Ask your crush out

Let’s break those gender roles. Ask your person out instead. Whether you are in a full-on relationship, are having a fling or are “benefitting” someone special, don’t wait for an invitation, ask them out. You don’t need to plan an extravagant date or anything, you can keep it simple and stay-in, maybe watch Suffragette or Frida?

Love yourself

Boys and girls can come and go and flings can dissolve into nothingness. The person you will be left with, is you. You don’t even need a date to celebrate Valentine’s Day. Not only is this a really empowering move but it’s a chance to catchup on that much-needed self care routine. Read a book you love, call your mum, hit the gym or meditate.

Celebrate the other people in your life

Valentine’s Day is so much more than just buying heart-shaped chocolate and flowers. Don’t spend your Valentine’s Day celebrating the romantic definition of love—use this holiday to celebrate platonic love. It can also be a day to see how many amazing people you have in your life. Friends, roommates or even with your BFFs, organise a cinema date together, or boardgames at your house. Just have a ton of fun, that’s what it’s about after all.

Dive into all the 2019 feminist gifts

It would be pretty tough not to notice all the incredible feminist gifts available. You could even make your own. Has anyone else seen that candle with ‘Burn the patriarchy’ on the front? Or those necklaces on Etsy with feminist engravings? You don’t need to splash out, and you could always buy yourself a little something something. A great excuse to purchase yet another feminist trinket.

Whatever your stance, remember that it takes two. If you want to celebrate Valentine’s Day this year with your partner, talk about it and figure out want you want to do together. Maybe you’re into sharing a box of chocolates or an adventurous night in a hotel room, maybe you just want a nice dinner and a handmade card, or maybe you want nothing at all. At the end of the day, feminism is just allowing women the choice, so whatever you choose have a happy Valentine’s Day, and celebrate how you want to.

To Read Next:

Kassi Emadi, Founder of Nuddy, London

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